Luke Waltons Forehead presented by the Sports Dude.

Friday, December 02, 2005 at 12:49 PM

I see no reason to boo.

First I will say I am going to keep this short and sweet, time is not on my side this afternoon. Also, I wrote this post ("A Thank You Note to Larry Brown") back on July 26 and, quite frankly, I still agree with most of what I said there. So really if you want to know what I truly feel about the situation then read that post either before or after you read this little ditty.

As far as I am concerned there would have been no title without LB. Even with Rasheed do any of you actually think they would have won with Carlisle at the helm? The answer, if you are being honest with yourself, is nothing other than "NO!" LB took the defensive foundation that was laid by Carlisle and broke those players down into that whole "right way" thing and got them that title. In fact, he had them within either a bonehead play away ('Sheed in game #5) or within minutes (in game #7) of winning back to backs. There is a banner hanging in the Palace, the place is now located on "Four Championship Drive" because of what Larry brought to the table so please think twice before you boo.

Lastly I have always felt this way about it - you know what you get with LB and that is a wandering eye. He was brought here by Joe D for one reason... to win a title. He came here for one reason... to not rebuild and to get the title. There was only one problem - it happened in the first year of the plan and therefore LB and the wandering eye happened a lot quicker then anyone thought possible. Look, Joe used LB and LB used Joe, it is as simple as that.

Quite frankly if I was at the Palace tonight I would stand and give the man a much deserved ovation but once the game starts I would cheer just as loud to have the Pistons blow him out of the Palace.

Thanks Larry and thank you for reading guys - the sports dude.

Thursday, December 01, 2005 at 10:39 AM

Blue skies, gray skies or new skies?

To start or not to start, that is the question here? Do you go with blue skies (Joey), gray skies (Jeff) or new skies (Dan)? Damn it Lions, I was going to forget all about this bloody soap opera you created and talk about Larry Brown coming back to the Palace tomorrow but no, you do something stupid (shocking!) and now I have to talk about you again. Why the hell do you torture me so? Actually, now that I think about it, why the hell do you torture all of us?

There has been a long comment thread on my last post pertaining to the surprise news that came out of the Allen Park Compound yesterday, that news being that Jauron named Jeff the starter this Sunday. For the record, if I was coach, I would have either started Joey (yes Evan, I am being honest!) or started Dan Orlovsky, Jeff Garcia would have been relegated to Gatorade and Clipboard duty on the sidelines. However, since I am not Jauron I can only guess as to why the hell he did this and what the hell this lack of logic really means. As I stated before, if it makes no sense to us then it makes perfect sense in Allen Park, thus you have the definition of “Lions Logic.” On that note I would like to take a few minutes here to briefly dissect this bonehead decision made by Jauron and post what my guesses are as to the “why” behind this puzzling move.

Before I get into my guesses, let me say this, even though I have never been a Joey supporter I still would have started him. What do you have to lose? If the decision has already been made to part ways after this season then let him “gun sling” for five games and at least showcase what little skill he may have for trade purposes. Second I would like to say this, for all of issues I have with Joey I also have issues with our offensive line (or obvious lack there of!), our inability to get the running game going because of said shitty line and the desire to only let KJ touch the ball twice in a game and the fact that the receivers drop passes like they take the word “hot” in “hot route” too seriously. Just because it is a “hot route” doesn’t mean the ball is hot like in hot potato you jack asses – catch the ball! Oh, and by the way Roy Williams, when you catch a lucky bounce in a game that you are getting torched in and it goes for a TD, don’t do anything celebrating in the end zone, especially a pose type one (see “Little Buddha” for reference), it only makes you look like a bigger ass and diva then you already are! Alright, there you have it, I got all that out of the way and I will say this one last time – should Joey start? Yes. Has he been part of the problem? Yes. Are there other parts to the problem? Yes, the entire offense from players to scheme has been part of the problem, so now on to my guesses. Quick disclaimer – these are my guesses as to help me figure out this BS known as “Lions Logic” and not necessarily the views of this blogger.

The first thing I think of is this, Jauron was the teams’ defensive coordinator and the defensive players have been fed up with Joey all season long. In order to please “his guys” he started Jeff because he has been listening to the defense bitch about Joey all season long and probably some last year as well. Now that he is in the head coach position he is going to take all that bitching to heart and please the guys he has been responsible for since last year.

The second thing I thought of, and this one is extremely weak but it made me go “Hmmm…” at least is, for whatever reason, since him and Mooch are long time friends he is giving it back to the Lions and saying “You fire my buddy well I am still starting his guy over yours!” Stupid and weak, I know, but the thought did at least pop into my head. I mean, think about it, what is Millen going to do; fire Jauron two days later and name Olsen coach? Silly logic, but after all, I am trying to think like a Lion here!

Another thing I thought of was simply, for whatever reason, Jauron really feels that Jeff gives them the best chance to win. He is looking at this as a mini five game audition for not keeping this job next year (why he would want to is beyond me!) but an audition for other teams as well to show that he still can coach. Maybe he is just as sick and twisted as Mooch and feels that Jeff can still get something out of that already bone dry tank, I don’t know, maybe he is just demented and still suffering from shell shock.

Yet another thought that popped into my sick and empty skull is the “younger guys” that Millen was speaking of was the divas and KJ and even Millen has given up on Joey. Maybe this whole organization just feels that the best way to evaluate the guys that are all but certain to be here next year (KJ, Roy and Mike – I think Joey and Charles are gone!) is to put Garcia under center and to let KJ run the ball 25-30 times. Pound it, pound it, pound it and not let Jeff even think about going down field (which is good because he can’t anyway!), just keep Jeff in the short passing game and see if these receivers can break something. Beyond that I still see no reason to start Jeff, but these are just hunches here people!

The last one (and yes this is the last one!) is maybe this is some sick and demented game Jauron is playing with all of us – the fans, the QB’s, damn the whole team! Maybe he is starting Jeff for one game, maybe just one half, knowing full well that Jeff can not survive in Greg Olsen’s offense, but you know who can? Joey can! Maybe Jauron is just putting Garcia out there to show everyone that the tank is dry and that when Jeff fails in comes Joey and he performs well in an offense better suited for him. Talk about a role reversal here folks, Joey replacing Jeff, think about it! I mean, I know it is a mean trick to play, but damn I like it and damn I hope it is true. That is the only thing I can see happening that makes any sense to start Garcia over Joey this Sunday that is it! Put Jeff under the bus for a change and bring in Joey to right the ship for a change. All the pieces are there to do it, I mean why else make Olsen coordinator over Tollner? Jeff would fit better into Tollners’ scheme wouldn’t he, where as Joey looked pretty decent last year with Olsen calling the shots? Man that would be something, but then again, even though it is one hell of a mean trick, it would fit right in there with all I learned at “Lions Logic 101.”

Well, that is it people, I hope you enjoyed my madness and I hope we get some good comments on this as well. Yes Evan, I truly meant it when I said I would have started Joey or Dan, Jeff should simply be the Gatorade boy. That is as long as he doesn’t throw the cups 50 feet straight up into the air! On that note I say good-bye and yes soon we will talk about the return of the vagabond one, LB. Peace out, just like the Lions season – the sports dude.

Wednesday, November 30, 2005 at 11:30 AM

Garcia to start Sunday...

This just in, according to WDFN the fan and one Tom "the Killer" Kowalski... Coach Dick Jauron has named Jeff Garcia the starter for Sunday against the Vikings. Can this strange little soap opera get any weirder? To me it is quite simple, this is now the third coach to try and get it thru Millen's fat and stubborn head... Harrington is crap! Think about it folks, Morningweg clearly didn't want Joey, Mooch obviously hated Joey now Jauron is saying it too? What else could it be? Why not give Joey five games and just say let it rip? Simply because there is no one in this organization that feels Joey will do anything under center, except for Millen. So he is an interim coach giving the nod to Garcia for what reason? You would think that Mooch being fired and Olsen being promoted to offensive coordinator would be all that Joey needed but I guess not.

I guess it makes sense though, because it makes no sense, which is the Lions way after all.

Later - the confused sports dude.

Monday, November 28, 2005 at 1:30 PM

"We're building something good here!"

Well, I guess it is all but official now, Mooch has been fired as coach of the Lions. Rumor has it that Dick Jauron has yet to except the "interim" position, seems he wants to be given the job plus a three year deal. If Jauron continues to be an ass about it then it appears QB Coach Gregg Olson will be given the interim tag. There is a press conference at approximately 4 PM at the Allen Park Practice Facility hosted by none other than the moustache himself, Matt Millen.

My opinion can be wrapped up in two very familiar sentences - "What the hell took so long" and "There is always next year." I guess it makes sense and I really could give two shits either way, that is how much I love the Lions. In fact I was joking with a guy at work today that the Lions should hold a contest and allow one lucky (or would it be unlucky?) fan to get some buddies together and coach the Lions for a Sunday. Couldn't do any worse, could they?

The last thing I would like to add on this is this - how ironic is it that the longest tenured coach in Detroit is now Flip Saunders, by like a week or so over Mike Babcock. Boy, isn't that something!?!?

Anyway, I hope all of you had a nice holiday weekend, I did and my waste line shows it! Hope you all are enjoying this Monday and take care - the sports dude.

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